The Process of Publishing

May 5, 2011
Today I spend an hour with the publisher's representatives.  That is like pulling teeth.  Each one is programmed with exactly what to say to callers. Of course, they do not know they are talking to SUPERMOM.

If I ask a question not on their list, they try to ignore me.

Otherwise, if it is not their specific area of concern, I get assigned to somebody else. So far, I have four people involved with my three little books--the first one, who took my money, the second, in the Production Department, the third, my Authors Representative, and a fourth in Marketing.  Each has me like a fish on her line.

I needed a receipt for my March payment of about $1,000, so at first the Operator said she could help (the first person did not come through).  It turned out I had to go to the Finance Dept., who I asked for in the first place.  Maybe they all work on commissions.

They communicate by email.  When you call, you can hear their little keys go click=clickclick-click.

Negotiating with Marketing was tough.  She started out with an offer for about $600.  "Impossible."  She whittled it down to $242.  That seemed Ok.  Then that turned out to be THREE payments of $242.  "Cant' do it." Finally I gained her respect.  She realized I had said I was 83 years old with no regular income.  She compared me with her grandmother, and I realized I was doing well.  Her grandmother's doctor, fighting Alzheimer's, learned the patient liked to garden.  He put her to counting the leaves on her plants.  Finally, we got down to $149, twice my Mother's Day gift receipts.  For a listing of five words about the play on Google.

I called her back to ask how Google inquirers could find out where to buy my play.  Since I thought to ask, I learned there would be a link to Xlibris.  The Finance Department lady (not counted before) called me back to verify what she had learned.  I do think they get paid by the number of calls they handle.  Otherwise, they either work part-time (not usually available when I call) or flex-time, which I would like since that might help them with children.

Anyway, I have proofed the galleys on the play and the poetry book.  Have put in three calls to try to get the galleys on the picture book.  The Author's Rep sent the wrong ones the first time she tried.  Then she got sick and had to go on leave.  I did not want to keep her as my representative since she had sounded like a smart-alex, but now I know she was sick and this morning it all seems to be OK.

Adventures! Of, as Alice said, curiouser and curiouser.

-Grandma Helen